Friday, July 29, 2011

I'm shallow

So last night was kind of a bust. We only really caught the tail end of the happenings (it was an outdoor event) and it was balls hot out so we were only at the thing for less than an hour. Just long enough to be DRENCHED in sweat.

Upon our arrival we were both offered cups of beer, but it was Mich Ultra which tastes like piss water so we declined. We are beer snobs. Every one else was sufficiently pumped full of alcohol (the beer was FREE) so we eventually each choked down a cup. It was, after all, free beer. Even though we missed most of the actual event, we would've stayed longer but the only people who were there were people we don't like to hang around. The real A-holes that husband works with. Once tolerably handsome Australian guy left we headed out too.

The only reason I really wanted to stay was that in the approximately 40 minutes we spent there I was called beautiful by two of his co-workers and hit on by a third. And being the shallow prick that I am, liked the attention.
It probably doesn't even count because they were all pretty drunk, but I'll take what I can get. The fact that there were three other women there and I was the one they were focusing on, well, I was soaking it in.

I hope you all are doing well! And thanks Fed Up, I guess I made the most of it. Even if I am a shallow ass-hat.

Sincerely,
Shallow Ass-hat.

Thursday, July 28, 2011

Staying healthy

Husband is going out of town next week for work. I will miss him. But I am trying to stay well because I plan on going on an exercise bender while he's gone. I wanted to last time he went away back in May but I was pretty much on my deathbed so I didn't leave the couch the whole time he was gone. I didn't even go to work. And I always go to work.

So for next week while he's gone I have two things I wish to accomplish:

1) Two extended workouts every day he is gone
2) Pick up extra shifts at work

It will also be nice sleeping in! I don't have to work until 10am usually but I am up at 6 every day with him. I could get up and workout before work, but I usually have more energy for it in the afternoon (for a better workout) so I will probably let my body rest in the morning, workout as soon as I get out of work and then again later at night. I'm on my feet all day at work anyway so I don't particularly like running or anything before hand because then I am too exhausted at work.

But I can't let myself get sick! I won't spend another week on the couch.

I'm not looking forward to tonight. We have to go to some thing that Husband's work is sponsoring. We have pretty much skipped out on every work function this year and some one else signed us up for this one so we kind of have to go.
It's times like this I wish I was a trophy wife.
Don't get me wrong, I'm young, blond and athletic and am constantly complimented on my smile so I guess I'm not an embarrassment to him or anything, but I don't feel like I am anything worth showing off. I think because I always feel too fat. I think in large part because of the numbers on the scale. I'm tall, so when I compare my weight to others around me I feel like I must look like a giant. A whale. A narwhal, if you will: big and awkward.

Also, I won't be able to go for a run today. We are meeting with some one about a townhouse tonight right after work and then going to the work function. My plan was to run this morning but we are currently experiencing a severe thunderstorm and I don't have a gym membership.

I miss my gym membership. Where we used to live there was a Planet Fitness which was great because it was only $10 per month and I only really use it when the weather is crappy or too cold (I actually love the cold weather but my asthma kicks in when I run in anything below about 45 degrees). I just can't justify spending $50 a month on something I hardly use. I want another cheap gym :(

Monday, July 25, 2011

Oh, hello

I've had a few new followers recently, so WELCOME!

Husband and I have been going out to eat too much lately. Saturday night was fun though. We were going to go to the movies, but we decided a matinee on Sunday would be less expensive (which it was, a lot!) so we went out to a pub in Illinois instead. It was fun, it felt like dating, but without the awkward date stuff. We sat at the bar, opened a tab and had a couple of drinks. Then we split some wings, then had more drinks. We talked and flirted and laughed a lot. It was a fun way to spend the evening.

On Sunday we went to see Horrible Bosses. It was hilarious! I laughed so hard throughout it.

So I think I'm going to focus on these things today because I am smiling just thinking about them. Instead of the fact that it is 10:30am and I have already consumed 820 calories. I'll sweat it out at work.

Friday, July 22, 2011

Judgement day

Have any of you seen this? Battle of the Bods? It is painful to watch. I don't know why I keep watching it, it makes me cringe. It's everything I am against.

If you haven't seen it, 5 women are being judged by three men. They have to put themselves/each other in order from 1 to 5 based on their face, specific body part, and over all looks, in the order they think the men would find them attractive. The men then put them in order of attractiveness and the women get money for each one they get right.

The first episode is the best though, because the one girl keeps going on and on about how she should be in first or second place for pretty much everything, and she does well in the first two rounds. Then in "the whole package" round, she is put last and she gets SO upset.

All along during the show, the host (who is a woman) has rude remarks to make about the girls.

I'm always talking about how women need to stop pitting themselves against each other and comparing their own faces/bodies to every one else. But there is a prize winning game show based on just that.



And this is the girl who got all upset, shortly after saying how she was so much prettier than every one else.

Wednesday, July 20, 2011

The weekend

I got back in to town just after midnight Monday night.

The weekend went pretty well considering I was with my mother the whole time. I got in late Friday night and Saturday morning the first thing my she did when I woke up was shove some donuts in my face. Here! Have some!

I took one, nibbled on it a little, then gave it to my niece while I took a shower and got ready for the wedding.

The wedding went well. I did my best to enjoy the reception even though I happened to be surrounded by a bunch of people from my childhood who never liked me. I can't explain why. No events occurred that would make them not like me, but even since pre-school this group of kids has not liked me.

But after the food consumption (and a lot of gin consumption) my ex-boyfriend's band played at the reception and every one was up from their seats and dancing. It was SOOOO hot out and I was sweating something fierce, but so was every one. I don't think I looked too bad. Looking back at some people's pictures, the only thing that really sucks is my arms are sooo huge. I hate them.

The dress I wore was a 6, but I found it was quite loose on me. Which is a good sign, because it was the one I wore back in May to my husband's cousin's rehearsal dinner and it was maybe a little snug on my then. When I wore it this past weekend I definitely could have gone with a dress at LEAST one size smaller. Probably could have even squeezed into it 2 sizes smaller.

Anyway, then on Sunday my mom had a cookout. My mom made sangria (she makes the best sangria) and so I spent the day drinking sangria and margaritas and enjoying the company of my friends. I went for a very long walk in the scorching heat with my friend in the morning, and went swimming three times throughout the afternoon/evening as I was sober enough to do so.

I came home a pound heavier, but I think a lot of that is travel bloat. My wedding band is quite tight on my finger which is a good indication I am just bloated. It should go down hopefully by tomorrow.

Another new goal? Well, two of them actually.
Next month I am going with my husband and his family on vacation to the Outer Banks. I am excited for it. But it will be a week of being on the beach which means I need to tone up PRONTO. Then in September is my best friend's wedding, which I am in and I am currently the fattest bridesmaid (which doesn't say much, all of her friends are TINY).

But I have some work to do.

Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Oh Happiness

I usually work day shifts but one of the evening shift girls asked me to switch with her today, so I have the morning off. I don't go in to work until 4pm. But since I am up every day at 6am with my husband, I figured I have lots of time to be productive. I was tempted to go back to bed after he left for work, but I resisted. So after consuming a piece of cheese and a glass of water, I set to business. I collected up all of our empty beer and wine bottles and took them to the bottle redemption center. I used to the money from them to get myself an iced coffee. I then went grocery shopping and then made a return at the mall. I came home, and started cold brewing some coffee for iced coffee (if you are looking to make your own, I highly recommend this page). After accomplishing these things, I was thinking to myself Man, I probably missed the hottest part of the day and all the sun (it's supposed to get cloudy this afternoon) and will have to be getting ready for work soon. I looked up at the clock... 10:30 am! Most excellent! I love having a productive morning. It is way earlier than I thought. So I am going to go for a run, do up the dishes, clean the bathroom, finish the laundry and then go to work. No boredom eating for me today!

Also, I was at the grocery store yesterday and I saw this energy drink. I am not typically a big fan of energy drinks. They are usually loaded with sugar, taste awful and give me heartburn. But I saw this, and it is flavored with Bing Cherry juice (and of course, other flavors). I love bing cherries and I had been looking for something to keep me awake this weekend when I drive the three hours to the airport at 4am. The price was 3 twelve ounce cans for 5 bucks so the price wasn't bad either. And I must say, they are the tastiest energy drink I have ever had. They are only 40 calories while at the same time not loaded with artificial sweetener. They do have sucralose, but it's not overpowering. And to top it all off, no heartburn! I tend to keep my energy drink consumption to a minimum, but I am quite sure I will purchase these again!


Sunday, July 10, 2011

Reason not to eat this week

It just occurred to me that my ex-boyfriend will be at the wedding next weekend. We're still good friends (even my husband likes him, and probably talks to him more than I do) and besides, I am the one who broke up with him; but there is still that desire to look great. Even though I am not a skinny as I was when we were together (I was at my lowest weight back then), I do think I am prettier than I was when we were together. My eyebrows are less bushy, my skin is less dry and uneven, my hair is twice as long, golden blond and lightened from the summer sun, and I dress more femininely (I used to be quite the tomboy). And while I know I won't get down to a weight that is near what it was when I was dating him (I was actually underweight back then, according to my BMI), I at least don't want to look like a whale. So this week, no sodium, no carbs, only water to drink, lots of exercise, get some sun.

Saturday, July 9, 2011

Wedding Weekend

One of my very best friends is getting married next weekend so I will be flying up to New England for that. I am excited for his wedding. Not excited to be staying with my parents. My dad is a saint and there is not a cruel or selfish bone in his body. I have nothing negative to say about him, ever. My mom however... Is difficult to say the least. She will spend 86% of the time complaining about everything in her life while somehow finding a way to glorify herself through her complaints, 6% of the time talking about my body and how "great" and "fabulous" I look, which she always says whenever I have gained weight. She thinks that she can reverse my sister's and my obsessive eating habits by telling us we look good when we gain weight and be "concerned" whenever we lose weight. Even though her concern is dripping with jealous disdain because she hates that we're skinnier than her.
The remaining 8% of the time she will spend force feeding me large meals followed by cookies.

Friday, July 8, 2011

www.winningateverything.com

The Patridge Family

I have a month long trial subscription to Hulu. I watched the show Audrina. I was never a fan of Laguna Beach or the Hills or the City but I like Audrina. I think mostly because a) she is stunning and b) her mother is EXACTLY like mine. Seriously. Watch the show. I can't even describe it.




And this video is a perfect example of everything that is wrong with this world. They are debating if Audrina looks "good" or "too skinny". Because if she wasn't "too skinny" we wouldn't think she looks good at all. And then wonder why all the celebs are starving themselves. They always need to lose weight or "eat a cheeseburger". It's ridiculous. Do people listen to themselves?

Sunday, July 3, 2011

Get drrraaaank!

This weekend, husband and I have been celebrating the 4th by visiting local breweries and getting a sampler of their beers.

1,700+ small US breweries account for just 5% of the beer enjoyed in the States while providing 50% of the brewery jobs.

Remember, Bud, Coors and Miller are not American owned companies (in fact Miller is owned by UK, so that would be a little ironic). This 4th of July, celebrate American, drink local brews.


PEACE