As is often the case, I've been wishing other people would post on here more, but haven't actually been posting myself. We're almost halfway through April.
I don't feel any smaller.
Which is getting increasingly more difficult to take because I'm getting tired. I'm running about between 30 and 40 miles each week, as well as doing yoga 3-4 times a week and PiYo twice a week. I'm keeping my intake between 600-1,000 and I'm soooo tired. I could just sleep all the time. I want a full day with no responsibilities so I can take some vicodin or something else I have kicking around and just sleep all day. I really wish I could sleep without the drugs, but no matter how late I go to sleep or how tired I am, I can't sleep past 6 am. Most days I'm awake by 5:15. Don't get me wrong, I like being a morning person, I really enjoy mornings. If I could fall asleep by 7pm I would love to, but I'm terrible at sleeping, even when tired. And I want every night to take something to help me sleep but I fear dependency so I typically just lie awake for hours and then wake up and start my day shortly after. Is living in an exhausted haze really superior to narcotic dependency? Not so sure. Really I just want to not have to move.